Sitting in a messy office

Existential crises aren’t new to me, I just never used precisely that word for them as a younger person. To look at the state of the world these days, it seems harder to find a sense of purpose, especially in the mundane. Writing blog posts, for instance.

Remember school? Career counseling? We were supposed to figure out what we were excited to do as a job, fit squarely into capitalism’s expectations of what a functioning member of society should be. I’m not sure I ever discovered precisely what I’m “most passionate” about. While it doesn’t constitute a failure on my part, there’s a part of my brain that keeps looking for an answer to that question. I graduated from uni over ten years ago, and I’m still fairly certain that the whole experience taught me a lot more about what I didn’t want out of life. Now, I have a normal day job and too many daydreams to count. Things I like, but not enough to point to and say “that, there, is why I’m here, in this body, as a human, right now. That gives me life.” So I keep reading, listening to music, finding new knitting projects, hoping that I’ll trip over a new idea that sends me into orbit around a completely new raison d’etre.

I’m trying to figure out a way to make this site work in a way that represents who I am/wish I was, so stay tuned for ongoing revisions/revelations.